[AYAOTD? Recap with Erin Callahan] Season 4.3 "The Tale of the Renegade Virus"

RECAP

Gary arrives late but in peak nerd-form, to weave a tale about the dangers of cyberspace and scare his kid brother into being a better human being.

Simon has no qualms with treating his “best friend” Evan like trash, going so far as to steal his bike and forcing Evan to walk to school. Evan swears revenge, but it seems like all is forgiven when the two find out their science teacher has finished the brain-controlled virtual reality video game he’s been working on. Evan allows Simon to try out the game first. Though Simon picks a “Knights of the Round Table” simulation, he ends up a freaky version of his own life and comes face to face with a computer virus determined to make the jump from cyberspace into Simon’s brain. Simon eventually realizes that Evan created the virus and planted it as payback. Simon finally apologizes just in time for Evan to give him the escape code and end the simulation. Or does he??

Terrified that Gary has planted a virus on his computer as payback, Tucker scampers off, much to the amusement of the rest of the Midnight Society.

REVIEW

T: Frank thinks people who use computers are losers! Oh, the early ’90s. You know Frank was a hunter and peckerer.

E: “Peckerer”? Is that the official terminology, Troyson? But you’re one-hundred percent right. He’s going to find himself sorely behind the times in just a few years. Newsflash, Frankie: By the time you are 35, the only way to get a date will be with a computer you carry in your pocket.

T: Gary’s late this week! I guess as much as we make fun of the overused “someone’s late this week!” routine, they kind of had to use it. Otherwise a group of friends show up and get right to business?

E: It becomes a bit of a cliche, but it adds an important bit of realism to the show. Plus, it’s funny as heck when Gary fails to abide by his own persnickety rule. 

T: On Gary’s weekend midnight trip, he stops somewhere and picks up an anti-virus program? Who the hell is Gare Bear hanging out with?

E: LOL. While watching, I was immediately like, “Oh snap. Someone’s just seen Hackers! Or maybe The Net!” Both are pretty terrible though instrumental in bringing concepts like cyberspace and early internet culture into the mainstream. But it turns out both movies didn’t come out until 1995! So J.D. MacHale...ahem...I mean Gary is just ahead of the curve. And the idea that a computer virus can infect a human brain is pretty rad. It’s almost like a twenty-minute tween version of Snow Crash, Neal Stephenson’s cyberpunk classic about neuro-linguistic viruses. Snow Crash was published in 1992, so it certainly could’ve been an influence on this episode.

T: It’s Christopher Redmon! After co-starring in “Crimson Clown” four episodes ago (thanks season break), he’s back as Simon. This time, he gets to play a smirky teen instead of a closeted (I headcanon) saint.

E: We definitely get to see some range from this kid. He goes from being a saint to being downright punch-worthy in this episode.

T: Just like “Crimson Clown,” this is another Gary story he’s telling to teach Tucker a lesson.

E: I love that this has become a thing. Morality plays aren’t my favorite kind of horror, but it makes so much sense considering the dynamic between Tucker and Gary.

T: Love the morning routine material. It feels like background character set-up, then it comes back to haunt Simon in a fantastic way.

E: Totally! There’s a very Groundhog Day vibe happening that really works and gets creepier with each repetition. The countdown clock is also effective at upping the creep factor, even though it seems completely arbitrary. Why would the virus give him a countdown?

T: Because it’s part of his programming. There’s computer game logic at play.

E: Eh — fair point. And I suppose even non-digital villains love toying with their victims.

T: Sonya doesn’t know who the science teacher is? I get that you have to work that exposition in for the audience, but Sonya goes to school there. She’d know.

E: This is a particularly unfortunate bit of forced exposition because it makes her look ridiculous, and we don’t have much to work with as is. She’s about as flat as flat gets.

T: They do a protag fake out, sort of like season one’s “Magician’s Apprentice.” We’re introduced to Simon but see him in a negative light, and start to spend time with Evan. We even get him complaining to himself about Simon. I’d imagine first time viewers might think Evan is the hero of this story until act two.

E: I think it works really well here. The back and forth is so much more engaging than the way “Laughing in the Dark” plays out, where the main character is just wholly unlikable and his best friend is basically a non-entity.

T: I know he’s not, but does the science teacher remind you of Kevin McDonald from Kids in the Hall?

E: Totally! I also immediately thought of Dweezil Zappa. The wackiness surrounding the science teacher seems like classic Ron Oliver. And he gets a call from the president?? Of the United States??? I guess if he’s invented brain-controlled VR in the 1990s, that makes sense.

T: So our villain this week is played by a little person. And I think it’s important to take a moment when a villain is played by a minority to ask why that is. For so many years, it was so common to make killers queer-coded to explain why they’re evil, or to Other-ize them to make them scarier. “Beware men, the killer in this movie wants to sleep with you!” I don’t think this is a case of Othering at all. I think it stems from wanting to make the Virus character’s major focus his brain, so a little person was cast to emphasize the brain. Knowing how progressive the AYAOTD? team was, I’d be incredibly surprised if anyone behind the scenes cast a little person to Other the character.

E: That’s a really interesting take. That said, even if the intent wasn’t to Other-ize little people, was that still the actual impact? I mean, the classic scene where he’s zipping up the bannister of the staircase feels a smidge like exploitation to me. Tough questions with no easy answers but I’m so glad we’re revisiting nostalgic bits of pop culture and having conversations like this.

T: The creepy-ass camera angles during the dream are so effective. There’s so many little touches that make the whole sequence really come to life.

E: Ron Oliver really excels at creating a feeling of disorientation that’s just as zany as it is creepy. It’s like a fun house mirror!

T: I love Simon’s reactions. He just dreamed himself in boxer shorts in front of his entire class, freaks out, sees he’s wearing clothes again and grunts in frustration.

E: Even though I love the classroom scene, and the “I’m naked in class” nightmare is totally classic and relatable, it feels almost like an unnecessary cliche here.

T: The Virus calls Simon “Einstein” five times! I like that he’s one note and repeats phrases, like a computer character would.

E: Or, you know, like a one-armed villain in a blockbuster action movie that came out a few months before this episode. “Pop quiz, hotshot.”

T: We get some solid body horror in this one. Simon’s hand is all effed up with that computer and the Virus tries jacking into him while he’s tied down so he can be inside him… What?!

E: I love that they made the wound around the jack look all inflamed, but I’ll be honest -- I turned to my boyfriend during that scene and said, “This is pretty rape-y, right?” Ick.

T: So the Virus is in the real world at the end, or is this another Gary tale in which Simon is trapped forever in the (digital) vortex?

E: This makes no sense. I guess the most reasonable explanation is that Simon is still trapped in cyberspace. But I don’t actually think that’s what Gary was going for? And even if the virus actually managed to implant himself in Simon’s brain, how the freaking flip is he now corporeal?

T: The Evan/Simon relationship is SO weird. They’re best friends who constantly punk each other, I guess? So this starts with Simon stealing Evan’s bike, which causes Evan to be late for school (kinda), but Simon points out that Evan put an egg in his shoe the day before. As soon as Evan’s bitched out by their teacher, Simon apologizes, reiterating that his prank was just payback. Then he’s venting about his worries to Sonya, and apologizes AGAIN to Evan. Is it toxic or are they both playful? At the end, Evan apologizes, calling him “Si” and Simon shrugs it off and steals his bike AGAIN! I really can’t get a reading on them.

E: I’m going to go with toxic, though in a way that’s probably very common and totally rooted in our culture’s unfortunate interpretation of what it means to be a (cis het) boy. My proof? The fact that both you and I, a gay man and woman, do not understand how these two can be friends. There are some vulnerable moments where it’s clear that they care about each other, but the only way they can show it is by apologizing after hurting each other in seemingly cheeky or harmless ways. And we’re supposed to watch and shrug and go, “That’s just boys, right? Boys will be boys.” NO. No to infinity on that, y’all. Give your friend a goddamn hug, tell him he’s amazing, and stop stealing his bike. It’s not hard.

QUEER OR NOT?

T: Maybe it’s a stretch, but I kind of see Simon and Evan as closeted. They’re both trying to get Sonya, but – and I’m not saying women are objects or anything – she comes off as one more thing for them to fight about. I don’t know if either of them actually have feelings for her, but they want to “win” and show up the other one by being with her.

E: As I said above, Sonya is as flat at flat can be, so this would make sense. Even if they don’t have the hots for each other, it doesn’t seem like they have any genuine interest in her. I’d bet if I went back and watched the scenes with all three of them, the two of them are looking at each other, not her. This take also jives nicely with my theory that the two of them care about each other, but can’t show it in healthy ways because of toxic masculinity. The pressure to disguise any actual feelings would be intensified if they were romantically or sexually attracted to each other.

TRIVIA, USELESS TRIVIA

T: Sonya is played by Melissa Galianos, who doesn’t have a lot more credits to her name, BUT she was in the excellent Canadian slasher The Clown at Midnight. I hardcore love this movie and can’t pass a chance to celebrate it. Oh, and Tatyana Ali, who co-starred in “The Tale of the Quicksilver” is also in it. A college group cleans up a theater that’s been shut down since a clown murdered an actress. Margot Kidder plays the drama teacher, Christopher Plummer is the theater owner, and it’s a fun little slasher. There’s a scene with the gay theater kid and Melissa Galianos’ character sword fighting that’s intercut with a sex scene that’s just really fun. It’s on some streaming services and it’s Troy recommended.

E: For those of you who don’t know, any horror movie recommended by Troy is worth checking out. I’m pretty sure I’ve never been disappointed. Hella weirded out, but not disappointed.

T: The giant bike lock has “Oliver” written on it. Ron Oliver directed this episode.

E: Yes, I saw that! Very nice Easter egg. Also, Evan has on the same shirt that Tucker’s had on a few times. Thus, he’s obviously Gary’s story stand-in for Tucker.

MODERNIZE ’90s CANADIAN KIDS

T: First of all, I’d let the story take place in Canada. The whole “The President is on the line” joke weirdly sets this in the USA. Secondly, the VR stuff all works, but you’d have to update the interface. And I love the Virus as is, but what if he was just a giant silver brain?

E: I just love when the actors say sorry and in that quintessentially Canadian way and we’re supposed to believe their Americans. Ha! Anyway, since audiences are much more savvy when it comes to computers and cyberspace now, you’d have to do a lot more work to make sure those parts are believable. That might even require the science teacher to come up with some sort of plausible explanation of how the VR interfaces with the human brain. And you’d probably also have to make these characters young twenty-somethings, like in “Dangerous Soup.” A science teacher testing this technology on minors is seriously unethical. I don’t know if a giant silver brain is the best possible personification of the virus, though that would certainly harken back to creature features in a way that I’m sure Ron Oliver would appreciate.

JUST GIVE IT A NUMERICAL RATING ALREADY

T: You got a memorable villain, a charismatic lead, and some freaky dream-like antics, what’s not to love in this one? The computer material hasn’t aged great, but it’s not super cringey like some ‘80s/’90s shows are. It’s just a fun episode. 8.8 OUT OF 10 CAMPFIRES.

E: I really want to love this one, but Sonya is so flat, the Virus is rape-y, and the end makes zero sense. That said, the science teacher is fun, the “Forgot your combo?” line is so classic, and this was pretty cutting-edge storytelling for 1994. I’m going with 7 OUT OF 10 CAMPFIRES.