Last week introduced us to our four protagonists—Uly, Carly, Ford and Severine—and kind of gave us a brief overview of their troubles living in LA. All of them feel a bit out of sorts with their lives; from Uly’s failed attempts at acting and finding love to Carly’s dissatisfied love life to Ford and Severine’s different approaches to dating, they all are stuck. And then we have an alien lizardman thing that is raping at least one homeless person. There was a lot of introductions and general plot threads.

Now in the second episode, “Where Is My Mind?” we dive deeper into their problems and find them falling deeper into their issues. Let’s dive in, as well.

ULY FALLS DOWN A RABBIT HOLE

Reeling from the events of the first episode, Uly rides his bike home and walks dazed into his apartment, where Ford is working out in his very tight briefs, and nothing else. Both of them are lost in thought but unable or unwilling to talk about what’s bothering them.

In his bedroom, Uly is back to smoking pot and Googles “reptilian aliens” and discovers the side of the internet that no sane person would traverse. The kind with wacky conspiracy theories, flat earthers, 9/11 deniers and Alex Jones. It’s not the Dark Web. Call it the Dumb Web.

Here, Uly discovers Mitchell Kent (played by HENRY FUCKING ROLLINS!) who has exposed an alien conspiracy! When he tells Carly about it, she’s obviously skeptical. As I said last week, she seems to be the more skeptical and smart one of the three best friends. She’s understandably incredulous: “Because you read it on the internet?”

Mitchell Kent (and now Uly) believes that reptilian aliens have been infiltrating the media, the government and “every level of our society for generations.” They shapeshift via mind control projection. Some of Kent’s claims? Obama is a reptile. And Putin. And Hitler. Queen Elizabeth. Bill Gates and…Beyoncé?

Now, I think it’s quite possible that Beyoncé is from another world. Her talent is too pure for a mere human. But this seems a bit like a very targeted list, right? But his channel has over 20 million views!

“I’ve seen sneezing cat videos with two billion views,” Carly reponds.

And honestly? Gurl, same. The whole thing is rather dubious, honestly, and I’d immediately be on Carly’s side. But what about Severine and her cronies? We see her later in the episode, looking at photos of mutilated animals. So there’s something going on.

Uly ends up getting a temp job as a security guard for some junk/car yard and it’s like the perfect job for him because he gets to sit around and do nothing. Except at midnight, he goes on a round and sees a car shaking in the junkyard. Approaching it, he hears sounds coming from inside it, flings open the door and…predictably, he screams again. This is becoming a trend with him.

What did he see? We’ll have to wait until next week, I guess.

CARLY TAKES CONTROL

We get to see Carly at her acting class and it’s quite a scene, as two of her classmates are improvising giving birth. It’s terribad. We know it. She knows it. And her acting teacher played by Mary Lynn Rajskub knows it. But she scolds Carly for showing her utter disdain. It’s an acting class; she should learn to smile. They have a moment in the restroom and I’m hoping we’ll see more of Mary’s character (who is unnamed so far, I think?).

Back with Jethro for another timid love-making sequence where both parties seem to be struggling to stay in the moment. Jethro keeps checking his phone while Carly is using a vibrator during coitus because she’s not getting what she needs from Jethro. They’re obviously not connecting, even though, as Carly says, “Your dick is inside of me. I’m pretty sure we can’t get much more connected than that.” But that’s just a way of sidestepping the fact that they just don’t seem in sync with each other, anymore.

But then Jethro accidentally knocks over a box of Carly’s sex and S&M toys for her cam gig and confronts her about it. Instead of telling him she’s been camming as a side hustle, she lies and says she bought them in hopes she’d be able to use them at some point.

I have to give Jethro a little credit, here. Even though he is such an “alpha male,” he says that if she’s into it, maybe he’ll let her spank him. And so she tentatively does. And when he says, “I’m not a pussy” she goes HAM on his ass. And then she does it harder. Harder. And there’s a subtle change in her face (as you can see above) as she starts wailing on his ass, as if she’s getting out every stressful ounce of anger she’s been holding in. Then he breaks and ends up blubbering into her breast. And just like that, boom. Suddenly they’re connecting and have the best sex they’ve had in a long time.

The wonders of a good paddle.

FORD IS GETTING USED

What we quickly learn about Ford this episode is that when he’s stressed or upset, he apparently works out like a man possessed. What’s bothering him? Two things. He’s still hung up on the idea of an open relationship. And, more importantly, after going down on Severine, he told her he loves her. Her response?

“Thank you. Are you going to finish, too? If so, could you please hurry, so I can get back to work?”

Listen, I think Severine is one of the more interesting characters in this show. She’s incredibly sex positive and very smart. You have to be, to be an astrobiological theorist. But she is also so cold and detached. She follows a very distinct and detached logical view of the world, which is at odds with Ford’s very emotional personality. I know they say opposites attract, but not when you’re this emotionally far away. They aren’t a good match. And I can’t actually see a future where Ford doesn’t get hurt in this relationship.

While he’s dealing with his conflicted feelings about Severine and their new open relationship, Ford meets with the producer Barnabas, who says he absolutely loves Ford’s script. Barnabas invites Ford to a screening of Chris Hemsworth’s new movie and after party. There, Ford meets Otto West (Devan Long) and while I’m not quite sure what Otto does, I’m guessing he’s a director because he made Ford’s third favorite movie. He’s also dressed in a very tight-fitting gold shirt and, like Barnabas, is intently interested in Ford’s…talents.

To quote Uly, “Call me paranoid, but that Barnabas dude seems ultra sketch.” You can throw Otto into that assessment, as well. But as Uly is getting sucked further and further into Kent-land, Ford is so earnestly allowing himself to be taken advantage of. I hope I’m wrong, but his script sounds like a mess. Carly and Uly describe it as a post apocalyptic Lethal Weapon. With cyborg vampires.

Later that night, we finally see Severine’s apartment. And gurl. It’s as cold and detached as her personality. I think it’s literally made of steel. Like the entire apartment is an industrial fridge. With metallic-black furniture. It’s so severely modern that it makes modern look antiquated. And when Ford shows up, thinking he’s going to get some romantic time with Severine, he’s surprised by her futuristic sex robot lewks and the sudden appearance of Daphne (Jordyn Chang), a hoodie-wearing, bat-carrying member of Antifa.

Turns out, Severine wants to watch him have sex with Daphne. Ford’s obviously uncomfortable and not feeling it. He does it anyway, but has to resort to repeating, “I love you…I love you…” to Daphne in order to get excited. It’s so sad. After Daphne leaves and it’s just Ford and Severine cuddling, he asks if she liked watching and she said yes. And while Ford says that her words are like poetry, the episode ends on Ford’s smiling face. But the smile soon deflates and fades.

This isn’t going to end well.

RANDOM THOUGHTS

My favorite lines:
- “You know I heart you like a homely sister.”
- “I love Ford like a blowjob on a Sunday afternoon but his script was terrible.”
- “Damn. You’re like the reason the female gaze was invented.”
- “These ball gags are like your nukes?”
- “A dildo just hit me in the eye! What if I get conjunctivitis?!”
Sorry not sorry, but we see Beau’s hairy ass and I’m here for it.
We don’t see Gabriel this episode, but in a brief flashback to their first date, he says he also has lucid dreams like Uly, where he thinks he must warn people. The connection between the two seems very strong and I’m still hanging onto this idea that they might be the same person.
I’m wondering when Henry Rollins will show up again. He’s a badass.
While Severine might be the most interesting character on the show (so far), Carly is probably my favorite. Kelli Berglund is very witty and her comedic timing is perfection.
I love the use of color in this show. It’s very candy-colored neon and bright which contrasted perfectly with the tonal opposite that is Severine’s apartment.

So what about you, fellow Apocalypters? What’d you think about this episode? Is Beyoncé an alien reptile? Is Barnabas truly interested in Ford’s script? Will there be a moment when Uly isn’t smoking pot? Let me know what you think on Twitter!

Until next time, grab a paddle, bend over and get in the mood for a spanking with the funk of GusGus:

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